To speak, or not to speak, that is the question? by Moksha Mishra

While I had conversations with several people who have faced sexual abuse at some point in their life, I came across these three most concerning thoughts that really shush the victims from speaking up about their abusers and refrain them from asking for help.
“Tell this to your friends or family”, it’s easier said than done. Innumerable thoughts encompass the victim making him/her feel as if they permitted the abuse by remaining silent or because they experienced a physical pleasure because of the abuse.
Sometimes, even if a person gathers the courage to speak about it, (s)he is not believed, is silenced or is blamed for carrying themselves in a certain way. To speak, or not to speak, becomes the question.
It’s extremely important to understand that IT’S NOT THE VICTIM’S FAULT IN ANY OF THE ABOVE CONDITIONS. A victim can not be blamed because (s)he was unable to avoid the abuser. At the same time, people who have faced sexual abuse should also know that it’s the abuser and only the abuser who is at fault for such an act. You should speak up about it, let other people know about the kind of person they share their space with and always start sharing such an experience with someone who trusts you and is willing to back you no matter what. Share the strength and eventually you will definitely find the courage to fight against such acts.
Most of the people who shared their struggles in speaking up about it, realised how they should have spoken about it earlier while sharing it with me today. The conversations helped me to understand that all they need is someone who can listen to them and guide them out of their disturbed peace of mind that not only the abuse but the dilemmas that follow it can cause.
To speak, or not to speak, should NOT be the question. Change the approach in order to make the environment strict for the abusers, not the victims.

2 Replies to “To speak, or not to speak, that is the question? by Moksha Mishra”

  • You have highlighted a major concern! It’s so easy for us to suggest or advice the other person to open up in front of their family or friends, while the victim might still feel anxious or terrified, the brutal incident might have affected their mental and emotional health!
    It’s so important for us to establish good communication and connection while being open for conversations about such topics, to make the other person feel comfortable sharing.

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